Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Randomize
