The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize