4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
