Can i not drive my cunt home
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
