We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
