Just mADE A PArabola og urine
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
