I'm drive I can fine osifer
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
