Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Randomize