Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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