so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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