the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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