He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
worst night to have a conscience
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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