DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
