It's like God shit irony all over that family
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
