Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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