have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
