glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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