I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
