as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
There r osticjed everywhere
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize