Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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