My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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