great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Can I color on your dick again?
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
