Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
