I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
