Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Fuck appropriateness.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Randomize
