I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
