The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
