he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
