dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Randomize
