I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
