Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize