Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize
