I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
