4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
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