why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
