My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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