this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
