Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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