she sounds like chewbacca in bed
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize