well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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