hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Randomize