my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
My penis needs a shock collar
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
