I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
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