"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
