You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
