I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
