You're a womanizer and a bitch.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
