There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
