Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
