Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
