I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
