Small penises have feelings too.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Randomize
